Stop trying to prove yourself to everyone in your work
Operate from inspired action rather than external validation
my personal experience
I have been facing a unique situation at work that has led to a profound insight.
For at least a month and a half, I have been abandoned in my role. I found myself without tasks and without guidance. I had 40 hours per week to fill, a small portion of this being devoted to assigned tasks.
It took all this time (and lots of reflection) to recognize the opportunity before me: one in which I could take creative initiatives, suggest and implement improvements in the organization, and contribute my unique perspective.
Why I didn’t do this sooner? I feared that my contribution would not be welcomed.
All this time that I have been autonomous and free of structure and supervision, I could have been emploring potential projects that could add beautifully to the business’ culture, structure, and offers.
the significance
I feel as if this insight has freed me from years of trying to prove myself in the context of my work.
Even outside of my work — as I seek validation and recognition in my entrepreneurial side projects.
In reality, the seeking for external recognition held me back from enjoying the process and finding joy in my work, as well as from advancing and succeeding in the ways I hoped for.
This outward fixation also prevented me from doing good work, work I personally would be proud of.
Now I am simply excited to brainstorm projects, act on my ideas, get my team on board, and redefine my role.
the hidden cost of fear
None of this progress would have been possible if I had not been willing to face my fears, my inner narriative, my limiting beliefs.
While I would have loved to realize this earlier, I would not have been able to.
Fear overcame me and prevented me from imaging another possibility.
What I previously saw in this situation was a need to further prove myself — show that I could be productive and contribute in spite of the lack of guidance, structure, and feedback. I have been left to my own accord all this time, and yet I felt responsible for making up for the gap in my work.
I feared that management would spontaneously reappear and penalize me (or at least be disappointed) by how little I had achieved.
I was often tense, struggled to laugh and joke with my team, and kept to myself. I relied too heavily on AI and lacked inspiration and creativity during the workday. And I occupied a lot of fearful thoughts, mostly related to what could go wrong in my situation.
I compensated for all this by doing more activities outside of work, taking on more hobbies such as writing and drawing, and eventually bringing my failing entrepreneurial efforts to a halt. I stopped taking life so seriously until I realized I could apply this mentality to my work.
what inspired action feels like
Stepping into this new reality was lots of fun and a big relief relative to the last one.
I effectively transitioned from days spent trying to seek out ways I could contribute — featuring no creativity (and no good ideas).
To sitting back and imaging what would add to the organization in meaningful ways.
The ideas flowed to me easily — a blog, newsletter ideas, videos, photoshoots of the activities, creating a bank of content to use for future videos.
All that was left to do was follow the path of least resistance: What direction was least intimidating, easier to act on, provoking the least amount of fear?
What followed was ease, more ideas, and (go figure) productivity.
detaching
This time around, I was not evaluating myself.
I was fully excited by my projects and had no doubt that they would provide value to my nonprofit.
Not only had the ideas been exciting on their own, but they were easy to justify.
Videos — we need more visibility and reels could be effective for this and be fun to make (and an opportunity for the team to bond).
A content bank — we are in need of content to use for future videos to promote our activities.
A blog — this could drive more traffic to our website, provide value to our clientele and demonstrate our expertise in our market.
I no longer needed the validation of my superiors. By detaching from the need for their recognition and approval (from needing to please them), I stepped into a version of myself that could provide more value than I ever have in this role.
inspired action daily
Distinguishing between inspired action and external action in daily life is easy if you are willing to examine what is behind the action: the motivation.
For the action that you have in mind, are you motivated by external recognition, by the outcome?
Or are you motivated by the pleasure entailed in the action?
Even if the action is assigned to you — if it is something you would not otherwise choose — can you detach from the outcome and make the most of the process?
Can you also detach from the need for recognition or validation?
If this detachment is challenging, it is enough to recognize the fear. Forcing its eradication is not going to be easy. Fear leaves on its own as you shift into a state of curiosity.
This transformation does not need to be immediate and it is not meant to be.
It took me a month and a half (arguably many years) to experience this shift. Now the challenge will be to maintain the creative state, to keep it joyful, and let things unfold naturally.
pulling it all together
When we stop chasing outcomes, recognition, and validation, we allow ourselves to experience a new state characterized by flow, creativity, inspiration, insight, and authenticity.
This is our natural state, one that we observe in youth and in fellow adults who have somehow managed to cultivate it. They may have been brought up with less fear in their lives and thus cultivated the habit of acting on their creative ideas and pursuing them without expectation.
For some of us this is more challenging, particularly if we are used to acting from and being in a state of fear.
The shift is alike to getting rid of an old habit and adopting a new one.
This new habit of being present, open, heart-centered, and connected to your inspiration and intuition could be the solution to many of your problems.
You will see your health improve (physically, mentally, and emotionally) and your relationships flourish.
You might even see other bad habits begin to resolve.
This makes cultivating creativity the ultimate priority — one that can ripple out into all other areas of your life, influencing them for the better and leaving you feeling lighter and happier.
invitations to reflect
What outcomes are you currently attached you?
Whose validation do you feel you need?
What would it feel like to let go of both?
-pascale
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